okhay so the most amazingly perfect girl in the world told me she’s not in love with me.

but you know after one night of throwing everything out I’m okay.

because I wouldnt be able to make her happy anyways.

so I guess I’ll just deal with it

I’m keeping her portrait though.

she didnt even know I made that one.

I wanted to give it to her but now she’ll think I’m after something.

oh well

1 jaar geleden // 0 notities

Diego Rivera (1886-1957)
Self-Portrait, 1907. Oil on canvas.
Museo Dolores Olmedo Patino, Mexico City, Mexico-

love it love it love it love it!

thanks for the reactions to my question (or cry for help) from a while ago. I tried to woo her ;D but it didnt work out. plus I felt guilty because clearly she loves him. so now I’m just sitting here being single together with my buddy raconteuse-dragomira. she’s actually a really witty person in real life. maybe a bit of a pessimist (hahaha!), but razorsharp. love ya buddy <3 thanks for everything.

just so you know what’s going on. after all, you all have the right to know.
have a great day!


1 jaar geleden // 0 notities

okay, so here’s the story. you guys.

I might be kind of (very much) in love with a friend of mine. (she’s just friggin perfect, really.)
problem is, she is pretty much completely straight.
and in love with my ex-boyfriend.

I am fully open for suggestions.

1 jaar geleden // 1 notitie

The Temple of Celestial Harmony.
There is a legend of a monastery deep in the mountains of Nepal wherein dwell an order of monks which never see evil or ugliness.  Their monastery is in a sheltered vale and protected by mountain passes.  The monks come to the monastery as infants and never leave their entire life, everywhere around them is nothing but beauty, serenity and peace.  There is no sickness here. Death, when it comes, usually at an age of around 110 years or more, sometimes a great deal more, is treated as a joyous occasion and there is no mourning. They raise their own crops and make a soothing drink called “tansgoma”. It is said to allow men to dream while waking.  They are said to be capable of shape shifting, often into birds, to travel to the heavenly realm at will and to see long distances while in meditation. They never leave but travelers in the summer of 1922 claimed they have an uncanny knowledge of the outside world including, so the village elders told them, knowledge of the then recent World War in Europe.
The people in the surrounding village are not permitted to enter the sanctuary but trade spices and other goods from a basket which is lowered from the walls at sunrise and again at sunset.  Here, there is no greed, no lust, no envy. All belongs to all. There is no hierarchy all are equal. Marco Polo heard of the Temple and these legends came down to us as the legend of Prester John and the lost city of Shangri-la  Four times in a thousand years enemies, each in their turn, have made their way to the walled monastery. The Mongols, the Rajputs, the Mughals and the Chinese.  Each lured by tales of golden idols, with eyes of ruby each the size of a melon. Each army was devastated, destroyed almost to the man by a raging plague which was borne upon the very air they breathed but which the monks and surrounding villagers are immune.
No Westerner has ever so much as touched the sacred walls of the temple compound. It is told that the great Alexander himself made it to the first pass but turned back when he discovered the bloated and blackened bodies of his advance force.  He went no further east in his conquests, his men threatening to mutiny, these battle hardened veterans had seen something in that valley which frightened them more than all the Armies of the east, and after turning westward back toward Macedon, Alexander was himself dead within the year. Near the opening of this pass lies the broken form of a 1970s era Russian jet fighter. The bodies of its two pilots still rotting in their harness. No effort has ever been made to recover their bodies. The Nepalese Army now guards the pass.  They deny the existence of the temple and will shoot any person regardless of nationality who tries to enter.  In 1992 a Japanese film crew consisting of expert mountaineers with modern gear, including oxygen and satellite communications, attempted to avoid the guarded pass by going over the mountain to the west of the temple. They were “lost” in the mountains no trace having ever been found.
It is said that the monks are waiting for something, but nobody knows why they wait.  Very little has come out of the valley since the 1920s. The mystery only deepens with each passing year.
Namasté: hmmmm hm. e_e


so this person at school asked we whether I was gay, bi, or straight. me I told her I didnt know. (she was all like “well you have to, everybody knows what they are.” and blah blah blah. which kind of pissed me off severely.)

Because. I have never had a relationship with a girl. but say, just…

with your usual lack of subtleness :P but this time it doesnt matter <3

1 jaar geleden // 2 notities
Open Your Eyes/Open Je Ogen, short poem.

Ogen zijn de spiegels van de ziel,
dus sluit ze niet voor wat je niet kent.
Omhels het, groei van de ervaring,
want groeien is een dwaler’s grootste talent.
-Onbekende schrijver

translated from Dutch:

Eyes are the mirrors of the soul,
so dont close them for what you don’t know.
Embrace, and grow from the experience,
because growing is a wanderer’s biggest talent.
-Unknown writer

1 jaar geleden // 4 notities